Friday, October 9, 2009

Dear Nobel Prize Committee,


I know it's a little late for nominations, but prior to today I didn't fully understand the requirements for qualifying for the Peace Prize.

You see, I thought it was hard.

However, upon further inspection (i.e. this morning's award), I'd like to throw my own hat in the ring and say:

I deserve the Nobel Peace Prize.

What makes me worthy of this honor, you ask?

  • Three days ago I gave a box of Special K to a homeless man on El Camino Real
  • I recently bought a hoodie with the words "Peace and Love" scripted on the back.
  • I'm a lover of all mankind. But mostly men - kind.
  • I like peace.
  • I deliver peace in the form of baked goods on a frequent basis.
  • I allow other cars to merge in front of me on the 5 (and try really hard not to merge INTO them).
  • I apologized for all my at-fault car accidents.
  • I've dated a few people that would qualify me for sainthood.
  • I'm willing to be Brandon Flower's publicist/manager/wife/mother of future children, PRO-BONO.
  • I totally bought a pair of TOMS shoes.
  • I stay out of the way of good surfers.
I think the choice here is fairly obvious.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Reflections of Life upon Turning TWENTY-SEVEN

Yes. I turned 27.

And before we go on, I need to get the sordid details off my chest immediately: I now have an odd vertical wrinkle along the center of my neck and what I can only call a varicose vein measuring 1/4 of an inch behind my left knee.

That said, these twenty-seven years have made me impossibly wise.

For it is in my aged wisdom that I offer the following treasures of advice, acquired through my 27 years of living:

  • ALWAYS make sure someone else is not already inhabiting the lane you're about to merge into.
Here's to the next 27.