Breaking up is hard to do

After three years of part-time work and fine-combed merino wool, the time has come for me to leave Ann Taylor.

The separation has been amicable. I will miss my discount and the uncanny ability I had to get paid for performing virtually no work at all.

Goodbye, Ann.

Unfortunately, there is a dark horse in this love triangle. I have found a new passion, greener pastures and, well, a better discount.

Hello, Banana.

Ann, I believe the choice here is quite obvious.